The Conspiracy.

I wish I didn't delete all of my previous postings on Myspace, but unfortunately, I did. Just to summarize, here's what's happening.

Me: 30-year old biological father of a 2+ year old son. Desperate for a divorce. She has all the forms.
Her: 30-year old jaded local supermodel. Has 2 sons, one with me. The other one? Even she doesn't know. Desperate for divorce too it seems, but she's taking too long to return a GODDAMN form.

We are both currently dating. She started it first. (I know, I know, childish)

I refer to the guy as "Mr. There He Is". That's probably because everytime I see her, he's there. I think he's also the designated driver of her new 4-wheel-drive. I think it's one of those crappy European ones. And it's red.

I can't look at her face, or listen to her voice. It drives me up the wall. It should, because I pretty much gave everything and gambled everything to be married to this woman. All I got in return was all bullshit. Like, a HUGE lump of bullshit.

Yes, the forms are still with her (3 months and counting) We've basically been separated since May 2003. That's a long time for emotions, especially hurtful and bad ones, to brew. I used to love that person, but she tops my shitlist right now. Her boyfriend 'scolds' me for not being a good father and for posting 'stories' on the Net, but hey, I'm articulate in writing, that's my gift.

And these 'stories', yes, they are all true. Like what Dan Brown said in the beginning of 'Angels & Demons' and 'The Da Vinci Code", they are all true. You can only get one side of the story though. Last I heard she wants to post a blog of her own too, so perhaps you can Google for a second opinion.

I need sleep.

Reborn.

I don't know how you got here, but it was obviously not because of me.

I got into lots of trouble for posting the truth on my previous Myspace blog. It was really good therapy for me, it made me really feel good, it was a reason for me to go on with my life. Unfortunately some people didn't agree with that idea, and made a big deal out of it. Mr. There He Is, especially.

They got to the point of messaging the one I love, and threatening to post blogs about her. Internet blackmail, that's the most modern thing nowadays. To be honest, she isn't much of a writer (or a thinker), so I am not worried, not the least bit. I wouldn't mind having her post a blog about me anyway, at least that would make me feel slightly important.

As I mentioned, no, this is not for sympathy.
This is therapy for me. And a lesson learned for you. You don't have to say anything, or comment, or whatever. But I just hope what I go through would be enough to make someone not go through the same things.

And all this was caused by, yes, a pot of hot tea.

p/s I am sorry munchkin, I know I promised you that I would stop blogging, but if I don't do this, I would die inside as a person. And I know you know that. It's the second time I've deleted my Myspace account because of her, and I don't know why i keep doing that for her, for he sake. I know its twisted, but then again, aren't we all?

Back to blogging

You know what? This time, I won't care what some of you might say. It doesn't matter. It does affect real life, but then again, this blog is going to be about real life.

So take it and shove it.